Intentional Connection: Choosing Your Spaces

Once you’ve given yourself permission to seek out new connections, the next step is figuring out where to actually find your people. As adults, it’s not as simple as showing up to a classroom every day. We have to be a bit more intentional.

Go Where Your Passions Are

Think about what genuinely interests you—books, crafting, fitness, community projects. Finding community starts with being in spaces where people naturally gather around shared interests. Look for groups, clubs, or regular meetups that focus on something you enjoy. Whether it’s a local book club, a volunteer opportunity, or a creative workshop, go where your passions are.

If you’re not sure where to start, think about what makes you feel the most like yourself. Are you happiest when you’re reading, hiking, or cooking? Start there. You’re more likely to find like-minded people when you’re in your element. Sometimes the challenge isn’t finding a group—it’s realizing that you’re allowed to pursue the things that make you happy without needing an excuse.

Consistency Builds Connection

The magic of community often comes from repeated, casual interactions. Try to frequent the same places regularly—a favorite café, a local park, or a recurring event. Familiarity makes it easier to start conversations and slowly get to know people. Showing up consistently is a way of saying, “I’m here, I’m invested, and I want to be part of this.” Over time, those small, casual moments add up to something more solid—a connection, a familiar face, a sense of belonging.

Be Open and Brave

Sometimes we’re so focused on not being intrusive that we end up closed off. Small gestures like smiling, making eye contact, or offering a simple compliment can signal to others that you’re open to connection. Sometimes, that’s all it takes for someone to strike up a conversation. There’s a quiet bravery in being the one who opens the door to connection—it doesn’t have to be grand or elaborate. It’s as simple as showing up as yourself, even when you’re unsure how it will go.

Of course, there will be awkward moments. Maybe you’ll fumble your words, or the conversation won’t flow like you hoped. That’s okay. Sometimes being part of a community means letting yourself be seen in all your imperfect, sometimes uncomfortable, realness. You don’t have to have the perfect icebreaker or know exactly what to say. Just being there, being open—that’s enough.

Choose Spaces That Feel Right

Sometimes we force ourselves into spaces that don’t really fit, just because they seem like they should. Pay attention to how you feel when you’re there. Do you feel at ease, or are you constantly second-guessing yourself? It’s okay to walk away from spaces that don’t align with who you are. Finding your community is less about forcing a connection and more about letting it grow where it naturally fits.

In the next part, we’ll explore the art of showing up consistently and how to turn those initial encounters into meaningful connections.